MahayanaBuddhism, #0

An index of heretical sects

• Pure Land
  • Just say "Amitabha" to be reborn after this life in a special heaven where you will receive special training to become an immortal God. Otherwise, endless rebirth, mostly consisting of hell realms.
• Nichiren
  • Give all your time and money to growing Soka Gakkai International or don't even dream of enlightenment.
• Zen, Soto
  • Just sit and you are enlightened. In fact you were already enlightened but this is how you make sure.
• Vajrayana / Tibetan Buddhism
  • Let your teacher fuck you and dose you with drugs and maybe you can learn magic to summon devils and see other worlds. You can't share your teachings/practices with others or demons will haunt you and you will go to hell for billions of years
• "Maitreya Buddhism"
  • Actually YiGuanDao and not Buddhism at all, except in Indonesia; deserving of its own article.